Ladies and gentlemen, GBF is here today to present you with a shocking-but-true observation. You might not like it, and it might be difficult to come to terms with. So, sit back, take a breather, and listen up: we are in the midst of an 80s revival.

And Urban Outfitters is a likely the definite culprit.

But, before I like, totally gag you with a spoon, I must say this: I–love–this–trend. Yes, I said it, fabsters. I’m guilty of supporting the revival of this decade of MJ, Madonna and Boy George. And you know what? I’m not sorry. So you go, Urban Outfitters. You keep on being a breeding ground for the most boss, bombdigity style on this side of the Valley.

Exhibit 1:

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W-O-W. Ms. Abdul would be proud. Footless tights and a speckled dress that bears a striking resemblance to an air brush tee from the strip at Myrtle Beach? I couldn’t be more proud.

Exhibit 2:

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This chick needs to be honest with herself. Girl, you KNOW you want to let that shell shirt slip off of one shoulder. While you’re at it, why don’t you go ahead and add an ash gray sports bra and a fluorescent orange scrunchy to the side ponytail that’s somewhere in there, dying to get out.

And loose that sour expression of yours, Missy, or I’ll give you something to frown about.

Exhibit 3:

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Um… no… I don’t have these tights in teal. I don’t know what you’re talking about. Definitely not. And they’re definitely not pictured in the FABout Me section of this blog. No, that would be too 80s. Come ON, people. You’ve got to draw the line somewhere.

Exhibit 4:

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The first time I saw these gray, leopard print skinny jeans, I thought to myself, “Um, OK, I’m pretty sure I had these in spandex when I was 8-years-old. Who would ever wear those?” And then I reflected, took a deep breath and shook my head in disappointment at myself. “You know who would wear those, Abbey?” I thought. “You would. How dare you lie to yourself like that. What are you so ashamed of?” And I replied, “Nothing. That’s what. You were fabulous when you were 8, Abbey. Hey, it was the 90s and you knew even then that the 80s would make a comeback.”

Yes, I think I shall order these.

And consider seeking psychiatric help.

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